So,early this morning everthing is smoother as usual....I'm not nervous at all [okay,maybe a little bit],becoz as far as I heard from my friends,their visiting lecturer come and see their presentation,meet their supervisor and ask them a few question,and not even 1/2 hour everything is settled..
and as time passing and I saw the clock reaching around 2.45pm,my heartbeat's rhythm become faster and faster [notes: like Arashi's hiphop song - A day in our life]..[as my lecturer promise to come on 3]....I was like [OMG!!what happen to me???my heart is going to explode!!!]
and my lecturer come around 3.15pm...we present as usual - with full of confidence and professionalism [I guess]....after present,we sit facing the lecturer and our supervisor for Q&A session...and this is when the story begin...
Lecturer : You say,you've learn how to work in team??Can u explain that..
: Can u give me the example on how you " Adapt with working environment and communications skill with employees and users??"
: What kind of word that you use to send email to the user that show you're professionalism??
: What is the difference between professional way and unprofessional way??
: Let's say you are in you're supervisor's shoes,what kind of trainee that u expected to come to work with you??
: Are you regeret to be assigned here because all the works that u do is not related at all from what you've learn in the university??
and our session last for 1 and half hour!!!!
OMmmmmmmOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~
I really had a drop-jaw when I heard this kind of "death" question...I think I must be sooooo relax when I heard my friends's story,and the opposite thing happen to me...My mind is totally blank..it's like my heart had many thing to say,but my mouth doesn't want to talk....I guess I just let my friends to answer those question while I'm just back up here and there...and the moment that I only talk when the lecturer point on me....[I guess he thinks I'm quiet person]..and it's totally a BIG failure for me...
I'm totally,seriously nervous right now,though I don't know why I've this kind of feeling...It's not like the first time I feel like this..but,what happen this is evening really make my heart hurt..I feel like a loser....yeahh...that feeling....THE LOSER'S FEELING...(T_______T)
and the worst part is when my eye 'caught' one of the evaluation form that the lecturer or supervisor answer based on our presentations and Q&A session...I don't know who the evaluation form is belong to,but all the assessment is answered with "3 - SATISFACTORY"...I was like..ooommmoooooo~ is that's mine???...just SATISFACTORY???not even GOOD???[I know that I'm far from the EXCELLENT result]...and after that moment,my mood change 360degree..I was like..."I'm dead, TOTALLY DEAD..." [I think I've repeat this millions time a long my way home]....
I don't know how to calm myself right now....I guess my heartbeat's hiphop-rhythm this evening is like a kind of sign that show something bad is going to happen ne~~.. I should forget what happen today....what's passed is pass... I should focus on my final report and gain marks from there...[I guess]
notakaki penulis : Arashi - Fight Song
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